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The Revealing

March 3rd, 2020 at 06:26 pm

So through a set of circumstances that my mom is calling divine intervention, almost the entirety of my debt was revealed to her. Of course I was...there is not a word that could accurately describe what I felt. My debt is definitely a source of shame & fear. Not fear in that I can’t pay it, but that it’s a cycle that I’ll never get out of.

So we had a discussion over the phone. She wanted to wait until later to talk since I was at work, but I hate that. When people have something serious to say to me I want to hear it now, not later. Anyway, after the discussion I went in & cut my TSP contributions down to the minimum I needed for my full match. That will put $600 more in my check before taxes. Once I finish paying off my TSP loan in July I’ll have another $250 a paycheck after taxes. Once I pay off my car I’ll have another $150 per paycheck, also after taxes of course. If I suspend my IRA contributions that’s another $500 a month.

I’m going to pull out my Dave Ramsey book & get serious. I may even take the course offered at church. I’m tired of this debt yo-yo & I’m going to nip it in the bud once & for all.

My mom asked me about my travel & will take the next 2 trips that I have scheduled. After that I’m on hiatus. It will be hard to pass up trips with my friends, but I’m so determined to do this. Also, I think my mom is somewhat in shock & I’d like her to not worry. She says that she isn’t, but like me, she’s a worrier by nature.

Posted in Investing ideas, Retirement readings, Savings stories, General musings, Debt diet, Spending stuff, Travel Tales, Credit Cards, Debt, Investing, Personal Finance, Retirement, Saving Money | 7 Comments »

7 Responses to “The Revealing”

  1. Creditcardfree Says:
    March 3rd, 2020 at 06:55 pm 1583261721
    1583261721

    Your mom just wants the best for you! You didn't say this, but I hope you want this for you more than you want to please her. Ultimately the motivated has to be yours. You did take great first steps! Do you have expenses you can reduce?

  2. Dido Says:
    March 3rd, 2020 at 07:03 pm 1583262222
    1583262222

    Committing to pay off the debt and to limit the travel expenses while you do so is laudable, as is committing to building up a source of reserve/liquid funds. That said, all in all, you've done amazingly well for yourself at age 42 with a net worth of $917,000 based on your sidebar information and your debts as less than 10% of your equity. To hear you describe this debt as a "source of shame and fear" makes me feel sad; you should be PROUD of yourself for having managed so well (which is not to say that you couldn't do better, by establishing a pool of assets in taxable accounts to have available for emergencies and for funding future large purchases ahead of time, such as the next car and future travels. Bravo to you for having done so well and keep up the good work!

  3. terri77 Says:
    March 3rd, 2020 at 07:29 pm 1583263752
    1583263752

    My expenses aren’t much. $300 every 2 weeks for mortgage, $160 for homeowners’ dues which covers a lot including management fees, insurance, water, sewage, lawn maintenance, & other such things. $150 for my car every 2 weeks. This will be paid off early next summer. My money goes to debt payoff for the most part. The $250 TSP loan comes out of my paycheck. The one thing I could reduce is cable, but I locked in a lower rate by agreeing to a 2 year commitment. I’ll have to check when the agreement ends. I am doing my best to spend as frivolously as I have in the past. I like to shop & travel. I just started back funding an emergency fund with $100 a month. I used to have an emergency fund that was well over $20k.

    And yes, I do want this for myself. It just took this incident to realize how much I wanted it. I don’t want to feel shameful about my money. Thank you for your kind, encouraging comments!

  4. LifeBalance Says:
    March 3rd, 2020 at 08:02 pm 1583265769
    1583265769

    I had the same thought as Dido. Certainly work your plan to eliminate debt but don't beat yourself up too much. You're ahead of the game for retirement savings.

  5. creditcardfree Says:
    March 3rd, 2020 at 09:23 pm 1583270619
    1583270619

    Glad to hear this is what you want too! You know us we will cheer you on for every debt payment you make!!

  6. Lucky Robin Says:
    March 4th, 2020 at 12:45 am 1583282707
    1583282707

    You're getting serious now. That is a great first step.

  7. rob62521 Says:
    March 5th, 2020 at 07:48 pm 1583437732
    1583437732

    Sometimes knowing someone else "knows" helps make you more accountable. I'm sure it was uncomfortable but perhaps this is the kick in the pants you needed to move ahead in your savings and debt payment goals.

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